1/ You have a bike - Check.
2/ You even know how to brake using retropedaling - My bike has hand brakes, but I have vague memories of using the pedals to brake from BMX days
3/ Walking from your faculty to the cafeteria has become unimaginable. You take your bike, even if it’s for 50meters - Nope. Still walk short distances. My wife does, though.
4/ Eating 7 slices of bread for lunch doesn’t scare you anymore - How can it when there are at least 7 different varieties? Love the dark wheat bread with nuts
5/ By the way, you stopped eating warm lunch. You just eat bread - Always been a big fan of sandwiches even before I started calling them broodjes. Although, attitudes toward lunch is the one of the biggest differences between here and Spain where you eat a three course meal served with wine.
6/ You know what a kroket is, and you learned to avoid the orange ones - I assume kroket is the Dutch word for croquette which is also available in Spain and France. But no orange ones
7/ It doesn’t surprise you anymore to eat at 18:30 - In the US people eat pretty early, too. Same with UK. It did take some adjustment after eight years in Spain when 21:00 is early for dinner.
8/ You drink beer - Drank it before I came. But not Hertog Jan which is probably my favorite mass market Dutch beer.
9/ You got used to trance and electro music - Prefer the darker side of Dutch music
10/ You don’t cheat on the train, because controllers are EVERYWHERE - Only met a controller once, but since I'm not a teenager who breaks rules thinking that I'm cool anymore, I still don't cheat the train.
11/ When the cafeteria is crowed, you line up neatly with the others - Of course! It's only civilized
12/ You used to use cash all the time, but now you have a pin card - Very true, until I go abroad, then it's back to cash all the time, because no where outside of the Netherlands knows what a pin card is.
13/ You think ducks are cute - Actually they scare me.
14/ As soon as the sun pops out, you make a barbecue, even if it’s 10°C outside - I think of the barbeque in the store that I almost bought.
15/ You think 15°C is warm - Depends if I'm in the sun or shade.
16/ You know winter stops in May, and not March as everywhere else - Are you kidding? March and April were the warmest months this year.
17/ You don’t remember what a mountain looks like - Very true. I forgot how much I missed rolling peaks when I was back in California.
18/ You still don’t know how to speak Dutch. But your English has improved - My Dutch is still cave man, I'm afraid. But is my English better? I end every sentence with, hè. I sound Canadian.
19/ You know what Surinam is. And where it is - Actually, I didn't but do now.
20/ You never go out without your bike lights - My bike is old with a light that runs off the spinning wheel. If I rode it with the light on all the time, I'd blow out a tire.
21/ You think butter in a bottle is normal - I hate butter.
22/ You know that all the guys are in Delft. And the girls, everywhere else, especially Leiden - No, I didn't. Next time I have a single friend visit I know where to send them.
23/ You go to Leiden on Saturday - Nope. Never been.
24/ You’ve been to a flower park, and thought it was cool - Very true, living here has brought out the hidden gardener that I didn't know even existed.
25/ You’re ok with having only one flavour of ice cream (the white ones) - Maybe in the rest of the Netherlands. We got chocolate here in Alkmaar.
26/ You don’t even bother to ask “do you speak English?”, you just speak English right away - More Like I say, "Hi?" and the person responds with rapid Dutch at which point I stare blankly and say, "Sorry" which works for both languages.
27/ When you go to the cinema, you are ok with being told where to sit - Same thing happens in Spain.
28/ And you wouldn’t dare sit anywhere else - I guess not.
29/ You have finally accepted the fact that Gouda is cheese - What else would it be?
30/ Paying 6€ for a meal in the cafeteria seems normal - Is that for one or three courses?
31/ You know how to repair a bike - Have yet to do it!
32/ You eat potatoes at least once a day - Natuurlijk
33/ You always check the weather before leaving home - Not any more. It's too depressing. I just make plans and go, but make sure to have my rain coat at all times.
34/ You know what it is being late and having to wait for a boat to cross the bridge - There's no worse feeling than when you have a plane to catch, and this slow moving boat with a single mast floats up a canal to pass under an open bridge.
35/ You can drink milk at any time of the day - Couldn't I before?
36/ Sometimes, you only drink milk as lunch - No, I only drink milk with my coffee and cereal
37/ You have tried karnemelk at least once - Not yet, but I will.
38/ You start liking dropjes - Liquorice makes me nauseous
39/ For you something sweet means straubwaffels - With peanut butter
40/ Spring means flowers blooming and construction sites opening up all over the place - But at least they're quick here. Have you ever seen a three man Spanish construction crew? One works, one smokes and watches, while the other gives orders.
41/ Being tall gets a new meaning - It's so when the dykes break no one will drown. If you're short, move to Belgium.
42/ Blonde is back to being a hair-color, not a concept - Very true.
43/ you have 4 seasons in one day - I've been meaning to write a post about that.
44/ you can start a mail to your teacher who happens
to be a doctor by “yo, wassup doc” (exaggeration can get the message
through) - Really? Would you then use the formal "you?"
45/ You think that paying to use the toilets is normal - I just find a tree.
46/ You know that kapsalon is not a typical turkish dish, but a hairdresser - I'm going bald and haven't paid for a haircut in 15 years. But it's good to know.I would've thought it was a place to buy baseball caps
47/ You start to think that the strange position of the hole in the WC is not that disgusting - Will make sure to look next time I have loose change to use the public facilities.
48/ You find it easier to find a good joint that a good coffee - The joints in coffeeshops are weak and overpriced. Just order a cafe latte.
49/ You have the AH bonus card - Yep, and still waiting for the benefits
50/ Your windows have no curtains, and you don’t care -The window that looks out onto the street has a metal blind. It's often down to block out the sun of course.
51/ If your windows have curtains, you don’t use them, and just don’t care who might be looking at you. The only window that doesn't have a curtain is in the bathroom. We like to give our neighbors a show in the morning.
52/ For you, light rain is not rain. - Light rain is spitting.
53/ Professors write a “well done” comment in your assignment and still grade you with a 6 - Teachers are all the same
54/ You can drink beer in the cinema (good) - Isn't the US the only country where you can't?
55/ 10°C is warm enough to wear a short or mini skirt - 10°C is when I stop wearing long underwear
56/ You can ride your bike in the rain, wind and even snow - I wish.
57/ guys are very cute - my mom asked me what I was going to do when our daughter brought home one of these you strapping lads.
58/ you can ride your bike wearing skirt (if you’re a girl), a suit or even high heels (if you’re a girl) - The last time I wore a suit was at my wedding. I haven't worn high-heels in a month, but didn't ride a bike, so I wouldn't know.
59/ When you start having strong opinion even if you vaguely know the topic - I was like that before I came. I blame the Spanish who are the same, but even less tactful and knowledgeable.
60/ When you “wash” the dishes with soap without rincing them - I had English flatmates who did the same thing.
61/ “alstublieft and dank u wel” are the only dutch words you know - Ha! I know ten times that.
62/ You aren’t surprised anymore that the disco closes at 4 (but it still pisses you off) - Go to LA. They close at 1:30.
63/ You learn to bike without using your hands on the handle - Never been able to do that, even when I rode regularly
64/ You go to the market and you only buy the stuffs that fit in you bike - In my shopping cart. The supermarket's two doors down.
65/ Riding a bike and driking coffee/smoking/eating lunch at the same time is not a problem any more - I have yet to try.
66/ You reformulate the saying “if you drink, don’t drive” by “if you drink, don’t ride” - I ride better drunk
67/ You’ve been asked where the coffeeshop is - This is Alkmaar, not Amsterdam. The tourists we get look for cheese, not weed.
68/ You start wearing orange during soccer events, even when you’re not dutch - I got an orange shirt that says Holland. It's my last name, so I can.
69/ You get used not to use napkins when eating. You just eat dirtily - I was a batchelor for ten years. That ain't nothing.
70/ You know what GVD stands for - Nope. But I know what AUB means
71/ You can never predict the weather and can not believe the weather forecast anymore - Isn't that the same in most places?
72/ You wait for the light to go green before crossing the street, even if there is no car - Nope. I still jaywalk.
73/ You sometimes eat only with a spoon - especially soup, cereal and ice cream
74/ You tried fried fish from the caravans at least once - Yet to do that.
75/ You clap the lecturer (just because he’s been speaking for 2 hours) - Don't know what to say.
76/ You run to Albert Heijn at 21.55 to get some beer for the party that night - Albert Heijn closes at ten? Not here.
77/ Trees planted in straight rows/ aka the forest/ seems normal - I haven't been to a forest yet.
78/ You think you understand why they don’t serve coffee at coffeeshops (but you’re not sure yet) - But they do and it's usually weak.
79/ You steal a bike at the station because the night before someone stole yours - Stealing is bad
80/ You think it is okay to eat multicoloured sprinkels on bread for breakfast - Why not? Is that different than a hazelnut chocolate spread?
81/ You use 9292ov.nl to go to the supermarket - Yes and other places.
82/ You know that the wind blows in your face regardless of the direction in which you are biking - It's better than when a sudden gust hits your side.
83/ You don’t even try to park in an unauthorised
area just to ‘pick something up in 5min’, because you know you will get a
ticket in 30secondes - I don't drive.
84/ When you move out of your apartment, you know you might have to take the floors with you - I'll keep that in mind.
85/ Stepping in doggiepoo on the sideawalk becomes almost a daily thing - People are pretty good about picking up after their animals where I live. Have you ever been to Spain?
86/ You end up eating super greasy food at 5am at FEBO or ALEV (Delft) - I don't remember the last time I was awake at 5am. If I wake up hungry, I go to the refrigerator
87/ And after that, you manage to bike home still completely wasted and go to class at 8:45 - Back in my partying days, I'm afraid to say I was in driving in LA, taking stimulants to stay awake
88/ You need an appointement to talk with your friends. Or your mother. - My mom and I do have a set time to talk, mostly because of the nine hour time difference. I've had coffee with my neighbors without making appointments
89/ You enjoy making tourists jump off the bike path - More like the ducks.
90/ You paid more for the lock of your bike than for the bike itself - Of course, without the lock, there'd be no bike
91/ Real bread? You’ve made your peace with it. It doesn’t exist - The bread is great here.
92/ You know that the Netherlands doesn’t have a special dish. They just fry everything - uitsmijter is typical Dutch, right?
93/ You know getting a couch will be difficult because it doesn’t fit through the door. Windows maybe? - Patio door more like it.
94/ You’re ok spending Queen’s Day in the train because people are walking on the rails - Why take the train when I can ride a bike to the city center?
95/ Yap, Joost and Jeroen are the names of most of the Dutch guys you know - Nope. Hans.
96/ when the sun pops up all your Dutch friends are wearing beach flip flops - Yep and the English across the North Sea are taking off their shirts to blind the passing planes.
97/ Dutch people ask you why don’t you speak Dutch? Had one person so far ask that, so I spoke to him in Spanish. Most are glad to speak English after hearing me butcher their language.
98/ You still don’t speak Dutch but watch silly Dutch TV shows like Take me out and Single - Why not? It helps with comprehesion. I learned Spanish by watching trash TV
99/ You have been in a relationship with at least one Dutch person - Nope. Married to a blond Spaniard. People sometime think she's Dutch. Does that count?
100/ You are used to people bumping into you abruptly on the street, yet never saying sorry - Just like walking the streets of Barcelona.
Wow! I didn't realize there were so many questions. Nearly half I'd say are applicable to other countries. The rest seem to revolve around bread and bikes. What about - You know you've lived in the Netherlands too long if you...
know all the neighbors' cats and they come in your house,
fake tan in the winter,
know was watching a movie in bioscoop is,
planted a tulip in the garden and wore wooden clogs when doing it,
used Marktplaats,
drive and camp for vacations,
put on an anorak when it rains to take your kid to the playground,
or said with complete sincerity, "We have a mild climate. Have you ever been to Germany?"
Wow! I didn't realize there were so many questions. Nearly half I'd say are applicable to other countries. The rest seem to revolve around bread and bikes. What about - You know you've lived in the Netherlands too long if you...
know all the neighbors' cats and they come in your house,
fake tan in the winter,
know was watching a movie in bioscoop is,
planted a tulip in the garden and wore wooden clogs when doing it,
used Marktplaats,
drive and camp for vacations,
put on an anorak when it rains to take your kid to the playground,
or said with complete sincerity, "We have a mild climate. Have you ever been to Germany?"
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